The World According to Ploy

December 27, 2009

Ploy S – her limits

Filed under: Uncategorized — by Ploy @ 9:29 pm

Inspired by Sherlock Holmes, “A Study in Scarlet,” Chapter 2

1. Knowledge of Literature – variable.

Knows the first and/or last to most classics, but then nil after that. Loves Shakespeare; refuses to read Austen; cannot comprehend Wuthering Heights; Greek tragedies are generally welcomed.
2. Knowledge of Philosophy – Practical

Knows the order of Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle, at the very least

3. Knowledge of Astronomy – Nil.
4. ” of Politics – Nil.
5. ” of Botany – Nil.
6. ” of Geography* – Profound, but unsystematic.

GoogleMap on my BlackBerry keeps locating me in the strangest of places, the latest of which was Herreruela, hitherto unheard of. As such, I am challenged daily to a game of ‘Where on Earth is this place?”

7. Knowledge of Chemistry – Accurate, but unsystematic.

8. Knowledge of Anatomy – Practical, but limited
9. Knowledge of Sensational Literature – Immense

Not only literature, but also including ridiculous, over-the-top films and songs and other types of media.

10. Practices soccer-meditation; that is, while I watch soccer, my only focus is on the ball and the Apocalypse can be occuring and I would still be concentrated on the game.
11. Is an expert shopper
12. Good practical knowledge of Japanese. Understands French almost perfectly but refuses to speak (because I can’t pull the accent off to save my life.)

If I handed this in for my resume, the reffect should be interesting.

*Note: In the original text, this was actually ‘Geology’

Advertisements

December 25, 2009

Sherlock Holmes, or: Sherlock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels

Filed under: Movie Reviews — by Ploy @ 12:29 am

A movie review. It’s been a while.

Also, before we begin: MERRY CHRISTMAS. The clock has just struck twelve here in Thailand. I think if I stay up late enough I might see Santa walk through the door. Yes, the door, because in Thailand we have no need for chimneys. Plus, if he can ride a sleigh pulled by reindeers across the sky, then clearly, picking a lock is in his powers.

But Santa gave me a Christmas present already! Namely, Sherlock Holmes…the movie. Before we go on, I must confess that I’ve never read any of the Holmes novels nor watch the original movies or TV series. So I walked in his without any preconceptions of Sherlock Holmes. Well, I do, a little: dude’s a sleuth. Dude is endowed with unparalelled of deduction. He smokes a pipe and wears nice suit jackets. His sidekick is Watson, who narrates the books, who is portly and, in my mind, is like the Holmes’ version of Bruce Wayne’s Alfred.

I think you can probably tell already, but I have no attachment whatsoever to the ‘classic’ Holmes. When I saw the trailer for this Guy Ritchie directed remake/redirection, I actually jumped up and down with glee. It’s not traditional, perhaps ome fans of the original would even consider it a blasphemy, but for someone like me, it’s a great update.

The Sherlock Holmes in this movie behaves not like the stoic, logical, reclusive Holmes of tradition, but rather like the typical Guy Ritchie hero. He’s tough, he’s sarcstic, and he’s manipulative. He’s a maniac-genius (he tests guns in his bedroom), he drinks excessively (sometimes his recreational beverages include drinks ‘meant for eye surgery’), and he frequents the 1890’s equivalent of a fight club (where he systematically analyzes, down to the recovery period, of how to knock his opponent flat out.) Holmes, as portrayed by Robert Downey Jr., is thoroughly the modern hero: he has the quirky charm of Jack Sparrow, the sarcastic wit of Tony Stark, and the battle skills of Batman. My advice is this: Go into this movie without any expectations, and you will enjoy it.

In addition, also change/erase your image of Watson. As most of you will know by now, Watson is portrayed by Jude Law, and ergo is neither portly nor clumsy nor just a sidekick. This incarnation of Watson is Holmes’ best friend, trusted ally, and an equal. It’s not a Batman-Robin relationship; they’re parters on equal ground. The chemistry between Mr. Downey Jr. and Mr. Law is amazing. And cute.

So erase all the things you’ve heard and go enjoy this. Also, keep in mind that this is a Guy Ritchie movie, ergo, you will see hand-to-hand fight scenes EVERY FIVE MINUTES. Sherlock Holmes is an action movie, not a crime thriller. It is ‘The Mentalist’-meets-‘Lock Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels’, not, well, the Sherlock Holmes of yore.

Rachel McAdams is a delight, too. Her role isn’t too large in this movie, though I think if there ever was a sequel (all my digits are crossed!) she’ll have a larger role to play. She plays Irene Adler, Holmes love interest/nemesis with so much confidence, yet at the same time she seems so vulnerable!

The rest of the cast member is well-casted and I don’t think anyone was one-dimensional. Oh, but except the villain. Which brings us to the only ‘meh’ aspect of Sherlock Holmes: the plot. The villains and their methods were readily predictable and, as stated above, aside from their antics, had uninteresting personalities.

I do hope there’s a sequel that comes out soon. Perhaps this movie wasn’t an A+ because it felt incomplete in terms of plot. But if you assume that there is something coming after, it’d be ok, because then this first installment would be just an introduction, Acts I & II, and as we all know, things get better in Acts III & IV. (And then everyone dies in Act V. At least in the Shakespeare that aren’t the comedies.)

I give this a….B+, because the conspiracy plot could’ve been more solid. But all in all…GO WATCH IT!

December 4, 2009

My date with me: a list of things to do on my first day off.

Filed under: Sheer Insanity — by Ploy @ 2:37 am

By Ploy Songkaeo, a girl who really needs a day off.

Wake up, reasonably late, but not too late as to waste half a day.

Wash my face, throw my hair up, put on enough makeup not to look dead, but not too much. This is, after all, my day off.

Put clothes on, too, of course. Bangkok may be many things – but not a nudist colony.

And flip flops, definitely flips flops. Nothing signals a day off better than flip flops.

Go to Central Ladprao and grab brunch at Ootoya; I want the ‘Charcoal grilled hamburger with demiglace sauce’ right about NOW.

By some DVDs, real, of course, if only because I am too lazy to find out if the fake DVD stores accept credit cards.

(Read: I never have cash. Ever. Yes, it is mildly inconvenient, but as long as Starbucks continues accepts credit cards for even the their 35 baht/$1 butterfly pastry, then I will never go hungry.)

Which has inspired me: after the DVDs, I should race to Starbucks right after to pick up a Grande Toffee Nut Frappucino and perhaps a cinnamon roll.

Then head down to the supermarket to stock up on popcorn and microwaveable food.

Also, some tomato puree and ground pork/chicken (‘Chinese’ beliefs held by my mother doesn’t allow beef into the casa). Seriously, at some point I should begin to use to stove to actually make my own food.

A list in a list: things to buy at the supermarket, aside from the aforementioned things:

Orange juice,

Milk,

Chocolate, preferably those ‘Merci’ Christmas edition ones,

Japanese Pocky, tons of them,

Actually, Japanese snacks in general will do just fine,

That’s…about it.

Oh, and bottled Starbucks lattes too, if they have it. (My fingers and toes are crossed.)

End of list.

Then, after stocking up, I’ll head home and hole up in the house for the next three days

Nothing, come hell or high water, will induce me to go out.

N-O-T-H-I-N-G.

I need to stay home. I haven’t had a day when I stayed home in almost a month.

Hibernation, that is what I need.

Ah, I ramble.

Now I must go back to work.

And yes, it is 3 am in the morning.

And also, yes, again, I just said I had to go back to work.

Don’t we all agree now I need a day off?

Blog at WordPress.com.